Survival of the richest

(Signal 4.12)

Kudos to the new American Dream. While the idea of the American Dream began to spread over a century ago, it has finally evolved into its purest form. At first it focused on hard work as the key to finding wealth, but Americans soon realized that hard work is overrated and unnecessary. Thankfully our leaders have developed new avenues for the allocation of fame and wealth to the most deserving. These include testing skills such as choosing the correct briefcase from Howie Mandel, outsmarting 5th graders, and receiving the most votes from viewers even if you are not the best singer (your day is coming Sanjaya!). Clearly our faith was misplaced, and hard work was only serving to distract us from realizing our true dream: to become wealthy without having to lift a finger. Now that wealth is available apart from pretense of work, Americans can finally reach their full potential and concentrate on things that matter the most like loading inspirational videos to You Tube and looking at pictures on Facebook that they have only seen twice. If evolution wasn’t just a gimmick used by the devil to make us question our faith, I would see this is a clear example of natural selection at work. There could even be some intrinsically American trait that has been selected over time which leads to our prosperity and fitness. I always thought that Darwin guy should have been born American; he would have been a magnificent Republican (a little queer and inadvertently turning more people away from God than Satan himself). Basically, America became a world power because of its vision for success (that, or the atom bomb), and the new trend to find wealth despite a lack of personal merit will continue to propel us to future prosperity lest we actually have to work and earn our income like the suckers in the rest of the world (see: the American Nightmare).